Saturday, May 14, 2016

That fateful night





She looked at the job she had just done and was pretty pleased. Neat and quick, she mused. Impressed with herself and armed with mounting confidence, she went about cleaning up whatever little mess she had created.

The house was quiet. There was nobody else in there, except her, or so she thought. The night looked sinister, eerie enough for a crime. A sudden breeze ruffled the curtains, startling her a bit, but she regained her composure just as fast as she had lost it. The stakes were high in her profession and she knew that. She tiptoed her fingers over her bald head to find that dried up scar. It still hurt. She had decided to sport a bald look, to remind herself to not slack. It proved too expensive on her last assignment. Not this time. The ticking clock brought her back to the present and also a sense of urgency in her movements.

Just then the phone rang, the shrill tone cutting through the stillness of the room.

Who in the world would call at this hour? 2 am ? She stood still with bated breath as if any movement from her would attract the attention of the caller. Her eyes hovered frantically over the body on the floor, half expecting it to wake up to the sudden sound. But it lay lifeless and totally dead.

"Hi! You have reached the Abrahams! Please leave a message and we will get back!" the machine chimed.

"Hey honey! Mommy here. If you are still up, I am coming home in fifteen minutes! You better be in bed sonny, or you will be sorry!"

She froze. There is a little guy somewhere in this house?! How could she not have known? They always gave the whole information. She fumbled in her pocket and brought out a dirty piece of paper. In fading letters was written Abram.

Fear gripped her and the ground beneath gave way as she mumbled, 'Who did I just kill?'




PS :  Written for IndiSpire. The prompt was "Just when everything started to look fine, the phone rings.."

PPS : A feeble attempt at fiction. Would be glad to have some feedback, dear people :)

7 comments:

  1. Replies
    1. Thank you Abhyudaya! Glad you liked it..

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  2. Very well written. Can I give a small suggestion? If you had put the line about the body " Her eyes hovered frantically over the body on the floor, half expecting it to wake up to the sudden sound. But it lay lifeless and totally dead." just after "She Froze" the thrill would be much more.

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    Replies
    1. Do keep writing. You painted quite an eerie picture

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    2. Thank you so much for your kind words Aparna! And am so glad you gave me feedback. Really appreciate it. My thought process was, she froze because of the sudden truth that dawned on her, that she made a mistake somewhere.

      But I see your point too. I wouldn't have given away what her job actually was until later. Thank you for showing me a different angle.

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